Chivalry – Dead, Alive or Evolved?


I’m back, it’s Millie with Millie in the City Matchmaking with the number one dating and relationship forum in the Washington, DC Metropolitan area.  Now that we have gotten that out the way, I want to discuss Chivalry.  So in honor of that, this article is appropriately titled: Is Chivalry Dead, Alive or Just Evolved?

Just the other day, I read an article about why chivalry is could be dead, all from a man’s perspective. Now, I thought that this article would be blaming the men for the death of chivalry.  Now let’s be honest, aren’t men responsible for opening doors and pulling out chairs and adhering to the cheesy normality’s associated with courting women? This is where it got interesting for me, instead of blasting men for their inadequacies and declining seduction techniques, it focused on how the women are actually responsible for chivalry’s death.

This is where I sum up their blame-nation for women causing the untimely death of chivalry:

Blame-Nation #1 – What the article basically said is that women, for one reason or another, have become complacent and have allowed men to get away with following the bare courting and chivalry minimum.

Here is how they explained it:  If a man takes a woman out and he shows her that he is more than just some creep looking to just get in her panties, chances are, you are going out again for a second date.  You may say that I am old fashioned, but a nice dinner is really worth the money to get to know someone.  If a man takes you out for a nice dinner, it may be because he is a nice guy and looking forward to spending time with you somewhere other than the boudoir.

Now, have women really become complacent, a lot of women may not agree.  Forty Seven percent of women that I have spoken with say that chivalry isn’t dead but merely has evolved.  Some of them say that they don’t need a man to pull out their chair for them but what they do need is respect.  I personally do not think respect is the bare minimum either, I think it’s the most freakin important thing that there is!  Is it trivial to assume that the “nice” guy taking you to the “nice” dinner isn’t a total creep or douche bag who’s only trying to get it? I mean, how is this guy more “chivalrous” than the one at the bar who makes no excuse for his true intentions? “Oh, you bought me a $20.00 meal at the Cheesecake Factory, well, there go my panties.” No way JOSE!

Is there an actual “right” way to court a woman these days?  There is not a one-size fits all approach. Some women like to be wined, dined and romanced while others have steadfast need to throw up a little in her mouth when a guy tries just a little too hard. What one woman sees as chivalrous, the other woman will see as aggressive or offensive.  Yes, we all know that the society we live in is one where the hookup culture is prevalent but are we women willing participants?  I will answer that question another day, another article.

In conclusion, more often than not, some women are not totally clear on the decisions they make.  However, saying that we have become complacent or somehow lowered our standards is literally offensive to many of us.  Because at the end of the day, being a gentleman should fall on a man’s shoulders–not ours.











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Millie Holmes

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