Millie’s Corner – Gold Diggers

GoldDiggerI’m back, its Millie with Millie in the City Matchmaking.  Now, in just over a month, Millie’s Corner has continued to become the number one dating and relationship forum in the Washington, DC Metropolitan area.  Now that we have gotten that out the way, let’s discuss Gold diggers! This article is appropriately titled: Digging for gold until platinum becomes available.

Just yesterday, I was invited to be a special guest on Angela Stribling’s show: Pillow Talk with Angela on WHUR 96.3 FM.  Our topic was: Gold diggers.  The Urban definition of a Gold digger is someone who seeks romantic involvement with a wealthy individual with the goal of obtaining wealth from the relationship. In simpler terms, my definition of a gold digger is someone who is with someone just for their money.  If their money disappeared, so would the gold digger.  A gold digger is a needy individual that will take up a lot of your money, time and energy.

Angela was curious to know, for her listeners of course, how to spot a Gold digger.  I gave her the following ways I thought you could spot one right away:

Way 1 You must understand what a gold digger is, and is not. There is nothing wrong with anyone being concerned about your financial stability. A long-term partnership or relationship means depending on each other through the ups and downs, and being financially reliable does help with that to a degree. The difference between a gold-digger and someone who values your role as a provider is that the gold digger would disparage and perhaps leave you if you lost your ability to provide for them financially. A good person can appreciate your financial resources, but a gold digger appreciates only that, and will not see the relationship as worthwhile if you are not well off.

Way 2 – Gold diggers drop hints that they’re having trouble paying their bills or sometimes they might even ask you directly for a “loan” to tide them over.

Way 3 Gold diggers have a sense of entitlement. They feel that they deserve to be treated well, and that includes knowing that someone is willing to spend money on them.

Way 4 – Ask the Gold digger meaningful questions such as:

  1. a) What is the best gift they’ve ever gotten? Gold diggers will almost always cite an expensive, material object, not a uniquely personal and thoughtful gift.
  2. b) What is the biggest thing you ever had to give up to do to get something you really wanted? A Gold digger will express something they have received that is material or material in nature.

Way 5 – See what questions they ask you like: what type of car do you drive, how much do you make a year, how many kids do you have or are you a homeowner?  Certain questions which might seem harmless might really be an attempt to judge your ability to provide. None of these questions, alone, should get you worried but all of them on the first date should definitely send red flags:  A Gold digger is a mobile calculator, therefore every question that relates to money is calculated to determine the percentage of the total amount that she/he believes she/he “deserves”.

Way 6 – On several dates, has this person ever offered to pay or when you do pay, does he or she say thank you? Do they ever offer to help you in other ways? (And no, physical intimacy does not count); do they cook you dinner when you’ve been out working late or run an errand for you when your schedule’s especially tight? If these character traits are missing, is this really someone you want to get involved with? A person doesn’t develop gratitude and generosity overnight.

If you are a kind of person who has trouble saying “no”, or who is intensely sympathetic and compassionate, you are more likely to bump into a gold digger. Listen to the types of questions you are asked. Even seemingly innocuous questions like “What do you do?” and “Where do you live?” can be loaded questions, asked in an attempt to ascertain your net worth and lifestyle.










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